This is the first chapter

#1 - I Write From Hell

Monday, November 28, 2016

#48 - If You Won't, He Will




He stood at the door of the cell.  The door itself was wide open.  The lamp in front of the painted mural hissed to itself then was silent.  His toes touched the line of the threshold as if pressed against a rock wall.

Ahrimaz held to the door posts not sure if he was holding himself up, holding himself back, or bracing to try and lunge through the opening, breath shuddering in and out of his lungs.

He could cross that threshold if asked, by anyone else, even the animals.  When Rutaçyen had asked him to step in and out of the cell a dozen times he could do it without a thought.  When he tried to leave the cell through his own volition, every muscle locked solid and he could go nowhere.

One finger at a time he pried his grip off the door posts, took a deep breath and tried to overbalance out the door and he lashed out and grabbed rather than take that step.  He could hear Limyé and the dogs coming, at least he assumed that Limyé was with the multi-scramble-claw-clicking rush of dog nails on stone. He closed his eyes and stepped back from the dangerous threshold, went down on one knee to be swarmingly greeted by slobbering dogs’s wet noses and tongues.  How he had changed.  Before he would never have tolerated it. 

But when he looked, Limyé was not there.  “Yes, yes, it’s all right, you’re good dogs yes, yes, what the scorch?”

He flinched back as the dogs each took a sleeve and began tugging him toward the door.  “Have you beasts gone mad?” He had to stagger to his feet, at least part way, or fall on his face, though the blocky dogs weren’t quite tall enough to let him stand straight with his cuffs clenched in their bull-baiting jaws.

They dragged him along, play growling, huffing, his hair over his face and when they had him at a door he didn’t recognize they let him go, sitting down so smartly that it looked as though he had commanded them.  Ahrimaz didn’t recognize the hall or the door, save that it was an outside door, heavy only against the weather. A rack of woolen cape/coats hung by the door.  He stood looking at the dogs, then shrugged and took a coat, before opening the door to see where they’d brought him.

He nearly stopped dead in his tracks but Sure seized his sleeve again and Teh ran ahead along the dark breezeway to tug on the rope obviously put there so that the animal could open and close the door.

Sure dragged him into the building and Ahrimaz did sit down in the sand as Teh closed the door behind them.  It was the oddest riding arena that he had ever seen and was different enough that he could seize control of his fear and the knotting in his stomach and just sit.

“Father, those are already being trained as warhorses, even if they’re just foals.”  The old monster had looked at him and started to smile.

“You’ll have to try harder than that, son.  You go down there and choose your horse.  That’s why I gave you a rope.  If they bite you, if they kick you, fight back.  Punch them. Grab a stick… there’s lots in the paddock.”

The foals… really they were nearly yearlings... had already learned that their job was to be killers.  They’d had slaves sent in before, unarmed, and the men knew that if they got out of the field alive they were free.  At this point in their training none of the slaves ever got out.

The herd had their own hierarchy. He could see that.  He focused on the one that would be lead, and picked up the rope.  Then he went in like a maniac, screaming, running for ‘his’ horse making them get in each other's way.  They’d knocked him over once but he’d slid into a gap between two trees, wheezing.  It turned out later that sometime in the scrum they’d broken his ribs.  When the lead horse reached to bite him Ahrimaz reached back and, lightning fast, pinched his top lip, whipped a twitch around it.

He staggered out of the paddock, leading his killer by the nose, the rest of the herd milling behind them, confused.

The wind picked up in this early morning hour and the light gradually got stronger, filtering in through the translucent panels all around the top of the walls.  The stables were all apparently arranged around the arena.  The warm smell of clean horses helped ease his gut as he sat, even as the rest of him tried to panic.   

I'm not hurting, learning to ride.

There was an interested equine head poking out over every stall door, long noses bobbing as they turned their heads this way and that to catch his scent.  Every stall had a line of shapes along the front wall where the horses could reach and when the light grew a little stronger half a dozen of them started tugging on the green circles.

One started kicking his door and trying to bull his way out, making nasty, aggressive whistles, yanking at his green flag hard enough to rip it loose.  He chewed on it, still screaming, though muffled until he dropped the mangled remains.

“Scorch and Drown you lot!” Ahrimaz cried.  “Do even the horses in this world get votes?  I don’t know what that means!  But I know you!  You’re a killer.”

But the dogs apparently did understand and trotted to several of the horses -- though not the one making the most fuss -- to casually pull their stall doors open and Ahrimaz lurched to his feet, ready to run.  “You all can’t be killer warhorses now, can you?”  He began backing up slowly arms spread, eyes fixed on the first horse out of his… her stall.  She was a two-colour patched mare with a white splash on one side of her face and a bay on the other.  She paced out deliberately, a few steps ahead of a black and white filly and a dapple grey.

His attention fixed on the horses, he forgot to yell at the dogs who had put him in such danger.  Teh had vanished from his immediate vision and he backed up a bit faster, only to fall backwards over the dog who knocked his knees out from behind.

He rolled to try and get to his feet and run but found the coat pinned him and knocked him flat once more and he lay on the sand with three of the horses around him, and the damned and scorched dogs, all looking down at him, standing or in the case of the dogs, sitting on his clothing to immobilize him.  He lay, panting, wondering idly if the dogs had finally picked up on his desire to die and brought him to this pass.  I’ve killed enough war-horses, in war and out of it.  Surely they can smell that on me.

He tried to summon the indifference he’d learned but failed utterly and found his body giving in to the panic and the pain he felt around horses.  It cut through the pink haze of the drug that Limyé had him on completely.

He look up at the flaring nostrils, lips loose, showing the enormous flat teeth that could bite so painfully, heard the scream of a horse still confined and him kicking and banging on the closed stall door.  “If you aren’t going to stomp me to death,” he said mildly, “… just let him out.  He’ll do it for you.”

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